I drove home from work today tired, but in a fine mood, listening to BB King’s Bluesville on Sirius Radio. Out of curiousity, I tapped the tuner a click or two, and found a station for Broadway show tunes. I was entertained by a song I did not recognize, followed by “Be a Dentist” from Little Shop of Horrors.
As I turned the corner to my street, I heard the beginning notes of a song I almost recognized. Then I heard the opening words, “If ever I would leave you…” from the musical Camelot. My mom was a huge fan of musicals generally, Camelot especially, and I was overwhelmed with the memory of her, the poignancy of the lyric, and the pain of our estrangement in the years before she died.
I’m not sure if any of my neighbors driving past noticed me as I sat crying in my car, parked at the curb in front of my house, but that was what that was about…
thatdifficultstage 
oh lord. i understand. it took my sister’s death for me to even start to have a relationship with my mom.
Thank you Carol. It is a damn shame what it takes sometimes.
I totally remember your Mom loving show tunes! Especially since they were not something ever played (or did anyone know what they were??) at my house. Isn’t it startling when music – similar to smells – can instantly transport you to a place/time/person when you least expect it?
I hope you know how many fond memories I have of Fran. She was a strong woman living through some really unfortunate circumstances. And I witnessed first hand how much she loved you.
Thank you. My mom was a very tender-hearted, romantic woman who was beaten down by her circumstances. I know that without question.
What is hard for me to “know” is the way she felt about me- so your recollection means a lot.